Thoughts from the end of the day (for my amusement).

There are far more important things for me to be doing right now, I can assure you, which is why I am writing you these silly thoughts. Please don’t assume any deeper meaning in my stories than that they amused me, for they did (do). Story 1: You know how it goes, that loose screw… Continue reading Thoughts from the end of the day (for my amusement).

Sometimes, I don’t want to be Mom.

How does it go? “The children are all snuggled down in their bed…” Yeah. Well, now they are. But before that was screaming, yelling, kicking, and, yes, moments of sweetness. But some days I get to the full point, to the breaking point where I find myself not wanting to be mom anymore, at least… Continue reading Sometimes, I don’t want to be Mom.

On the Blog and into Real Life

I took the kids to an extended family birthday party last night. It was a good night to let them all run, because all my kids had brought their crazy to Friday. So, us adults are standing around watching the kids run, when one family member asks me what I’ve been up to. **Now, let… Continue reading On the Blog and into Real Life

Sundays are Tough

Sometimes they are down right terrible. When number 2 is all excited to be dropped off at Sunday school at Grandma’s church but becomes confused because his preschool is also located here and then becomes upset, when he also realizes that you are leaving him there to go drop sister off at our Church.  We… Continue reading Sundays are Tough

The Harsh Realities of Parenting…

Hit me harder than I expected them to.  All my life my one desire was to create a family and here was my family, little, fragile, and needy. It wasn’t all I expected. My little angel came a month early and ended up with jaundice that took us back to the hospital, she didn’t latch… Continue reading The Harsh Realities of Parenting…

What Love Looks Like

1 Corinthians 4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.”

We’ve all read this verse, or at least, most Christians have.  As Pastor Jim said last Sunday during his sermon, it’s the go to verse for weddings, both of active Christians and nominal ones.
But, for me, he said something more important, or at least more pertinent to my life right now.  He pointed out that love is a baby crying in the middle of the night and tired parents taking care of it with kindness. He reminded me that sometimes a mom shows love by being patient amidst chaos.  Love doesn’t always look like a couple sharing romantic moments, or a hug between parent and child. Sometimes, love looks like a mom not loosing it on her kids when they are acting like crazy monkeys.
What do I want to say? Moms, we are in the thick of it. We don’t get to experience every day, with every child, those tender moments of snuggle and love, some days the way we get to show our kids love is by not flying off the handle when the little voices in our heads are screaming for silence, they are the moments when we remain calm despite the chaos.  Love is not always picture perfect, as I see around my house every day.
Another place I found that love is defined this way:
In all honesty, I hadn’t ever thought about my refraining from yelling at the kids as an act of love. I worry, daily, that I am giving them ample supply of what I think they need most from their mom, enough love.  In wrapping up, I spent a lot of time this last week hearing: “… and this how you show them love…” when chaos was swirling, my mind screaming, when I was trying to keep the peace and create calm, when I wanted to show them love but felt the pull of dishes, floor, and laundry, I remembered what I heard last Sunday: this is love.
Well, ladies, gentlemen, time to go show them some love as I shuffle them off to bed. I’m hoping that I will be able to show them love with hugs and kisses and kind words, but, if it all goes awry as it often does, I will show them love by not yelling and getting angry. I will show them love by being calm in this storm.